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I experience on nearly a daily basis, the following scenario; While greeting guests at the door of the funeral home or church, someone will walk up and say, “Bill and I are going to come and sit down with you and plan our funerals. We are going to do this very soon, I ‘ll call you in the next few weeks. We want to get this taken care of for our kids”.
The same routine over and over, often times predictably by the same people! Some do get around to it, but for many, it never happens. Months, many times years later, the funeral home phone will ring and one of their children will say, “Mom says she has it all planned with you, Dan”. I am blessed with a good memory inherited from both my parents, and often I can pull out statements their parents have made about things they like; songs, military honors, services that they like and services they don’t. There are also times when the well is dry and I can’t help them with any specifics even though often times I know their family well.
A new year is a new beginning and if you fall into the category that I just described, you need to resolve that 2020 is the year this necessary part of life will be dealt with. But how do you start?
It begins with a conversation with those closest to you. The National Funeral Directors Association began a program a few years ago called “Have the Talk of a Lifetime”®. It is an awareness program that suggests you sit down and talk about end of life; planning your services and how you want to be remembered. There is a link to the program on our funeral home website and is available from any funeral home who belongs to NFDA. It is an excellent way to open up what can be a sensitive topic.
You can also go through the entire planning process on our website by filling out the pages of information about your background, your family members and your wishes for services. Our website includes pricing information on our professional services, caskets, vaults, urns and printed material. It has links to area florists and cemeteries such as Ft. Snelling, Lakewood and the Catholic Cemeteries. You can plan it all, hit the button and it will be recorded in our offices.
One of our funeral directors, Jessi Rinne, is dedicated to the pre-arrangement process. She has hundreds of meetings a year with people interested in pre-planning their services as well as making payment for them. Minnesota has strict laws about how the accounts are set, using funeral insurance as the means of funding. Jessi is very knowledgeable in all aspects of pre-planning, including the intricate details when Medical Assistance spenddowns are necessary. She is available by either calling one of our three locations or via email jrinne@delmore.com.
Having the “Talk of a Lifetime” is a wonderful gift to your family. It gives those close to you an opportunity to express what they would need when that day comes, as it will for us all. Remember, the funeral commemorates a live well lived, a life that should be celebrated, but also needs to be grieved. Make sure you give those left a chance to share and shed a tear.
So there you have it, click a few times and an entire pre-plan will unfold, complete with an expert who can meet with you for general information and specific plans. A New Year’s resolution that starts with a talk and provides peace of mind for many lifetimes, yours and the ones you care for the most.
-Dan Delmore
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